Maggie Robinson

Nov 9
The Stud Farm

We’re not talking Irish thoroughbreds. Infamous Hollywood Madam Heidi Fleiss plans to open up a brothel in the Nevada desert catering to a female clientele exclusively. I do not object to the legalization of prostitution and lord knows, with every other romance book having courtesan in the title, even romance novels have come around. Brothels and gaming hells are a staple of Historical Romanceland, but sexual mores were vastly different then, if we are to believe everything we read.

But somehow I am icked out that a woman would pay to have her sexual urges satisfied. Modern-day men who pay for sex are rather pitiable to me. Maybe I’m too unworldly, but sex is inescapably twinned with love, or at least like, in my universe. Sex with strangers is, frankly, scary. And sad.

And then there are the mechanics of it. I know men are reputedly hound-dogs and can get it up for anything that moves, but….

Heidi is experiencing some red tape, and right now she’s operating a business called Dirty Laundry. That’s right. A laundromat. She’s keeping it clean for the time being.
Now, it would be my ultimate fantasy to have someone do my laundry rather than do me. I still have towels in the dryer from last weekend. What would you have your stud do for you?

21 comments to “The Stud Farm”

  1. Gillian Layne
     · November 9th, 2007 at 9:55 am · Link

    First of all, that picture…:)

    I’d work the man to a frazzle. The lawn needs tending, three rooms need paint, there are at least two loads of laundry to do this morning, and the oil needs changed in the truck.

    But most of all, he’d have a nice well-balanced meal on the table each evening and then stick around to clean it all up afterwards!

  2. Marnee Jo
     · November 9th, 2007 at 10:17 am · Link

    LOL! Maggie, isn’t it funny that male fantasies tend towards women working in the bedroom, and female fantasies tend toward men working in the yard.

    Seriously though, I always tell my husband that nothing says I love you better than a nice clean toilet (substitute clean laundry, vacuumed carpet, etc).

  3. Janga
     · November 9th, 2007 at 11:33 am · Link

    Maggie, this blog reminded me of one of my favorite jokes.

    A woman was sitting alone in a bar trying to find solace in her drink and delaying going home after a disastrous day when the best looking man she had ever seen walked into the bar. He was so gorgeous that she just could not take her eyes off him. And then–-he caught her eye and smiled. She couldn’t believe it. He strolled over to her table, leaned down and whispered huskily in her ear, “If you’ve got twenty dollars, I’ll do anything you want.”

    The woman looked at him in astonishment. “Anything?”

    “Anything you can dream up,” he insisted.

    She smiled at him in delight, pulled out a twenty, tucked it in his hand, and whispered, “Clean my house.”

  4. terrio
     · November 9th, 2007 at 11:56 am · Link

    I’m afraid I might be in the minority. I’m thinking Heidi has a damn good idea. But I’m single and 35 – you figure it out.

    Let’s face it, I would never get an incredible hottie to *voluntarily* team up with me for bedroom Olympics. I’m not saying I could pay for it – I’d have to think about that – but I can see where the service could sound attractive. Just the idea has my imagination working over time.

    I need to get out more…LOL!

  5. irisheyes
     · November 9th, 2007 at 2:58 pm · Link

    OMG Maggie, this is hysterical. I’m with you, although, my chore of choice would be the cooking (and cleaning up afterwards, thank you, Gillian!). Make it nutritious, delicious and he can fight with the kids about eating their veggies, too! LOL

    I, too, can’t get past the whole ick factor with the Heidi business venture. Paying for sex, male or female, just creeps me out. It’s funny how the picture of the hero who pays for a mistress in the historicals takes on a whole new persona and likability factor when you transport him ahead a couple hundred years! Nowadays he would just seem pathetic, and as you said pitiable!

  6. Maggie Robinson
     · November 9th, 2007 at 7:41 pm · Link

    Janga, love the joke! But I think he should have asked for more $$$. Housework is hard…

    Gillian, ever since my husband started watching the Food Network, he actually cooks…AND cleans up. But Marnee Jo, I don’t think he realizes you can clean other rooms besides the kitchen. *g*

    Irish, the same point you made—about what’s acceptable in historical romances— can be said for the whole age gap between the 17-18 year old heroine and the confirmed 30-odd year old rake. Nowadays, we’d wonder what was wrong with him. Future blog topic!

    Terrio,let me know when you’re ready to go to Pahrump (the town the Stud Farm will be in—what a great name. Reminds me of clown trumpet erotica for some reason). We’ll chip in and want all the details, LOL.

  7. terrio
     · November 9th, 2007 at 10:56 pm · Link

    Now that would be a birthday present!!!! LOL!

  8. Ericka Scott
     · November 10th, 2007 at 3:38 am · Link

    Dishes, laundry, walk the dog, mow the lawn, and cook, and clean the bathrooms…heck, my husband IS my stud! LOL. Hands off though, he’s mine and I’m keeping him —

    Janga…I laughed until I cried over the joke you posted!

  9. Anonymous
     · November 10th, 2007 at 2:45 pm · Link

    Terrio! I understand you perfectly. to get laid when single can be verrrry complicated. somehow going to man-land with a credit card seems soo much easier and safer in a way. (no risk of the date being a wacko-spycko killer, stalker or just relly crap at doin it..) you decide what preventives to use, what to do and how and when..

  10. Lindsey
     · November 11th, 2007 at 8:51 pm · Link

    There’s a really great erotic novel in here somewhere. We should definitely send Terri for research!

  11. Tessa Dare
     · November 12th, 2007 at 3:26 am · Link

    So, if this is a “service” that caters to women, do the clients get dinner with their stud first? And then a few hours of intelligent conversation? A full hour of foreplay? Cuddling in the afterglow? I mean, those are the things women fantasize about.

    But if one of those guys wants to come do yardwork shirtless while I sit on the porch and sip margaritas… I won’t complain.

  12. Maggie Robinson
     · November 12th, 2007 at 8:30 am · Link

    Tessa, no wonder you write hot romance novels—what an optimist! I’ll join you on that porch.

    Lindsey, I think the book’s probably already been written. But if Terrio is willing, we can fund her foray…even anonymous, who might be hard to reach, seems interested. Terrio can credit it us on the dedication page, where we’ll ALL become anonymous. *g*

    Ericka, seems like you’ve got a good guy there! Hang onto him.

  13. beverley
     · November 12th, 2007 at 12:50 pm · Link

    I so smiled when I first saw this post. Nice eye candy!!!Gosh, but the thought of a housekeeper for a month or even a week would be heaven sent. I need to have a clean bathroom but I’m so picky about it, I don’t think anyone would be able to clean it to my perfection. LOL!!

  14. MsHellion
     · November 12th, 2007 at 3:25 pm · Link

    No kidding about the picture! Morals or not, if HE was part of the Stud Farm, I’d whip out my credit card.

    I do find it fascinating that a woman purchasing a man for sexual pleasure is pitiful, but a man doing the same is…what? Supporting industry? *tsk, tsk* Brothels, no matter who’s buying and selling, is icky.

    The only pitiful thing I think of it…is if a girl just wants sex, TYPICALLY you’re supposed to be able to find that without having to pay for it. Granted, generally the ones offering do not look like the picture. I’m imagining in a brothel, not a lot of them look remotely like that anyway. And we have all heard (read) the stories of how a girl gets into this business, but how does a guy? Similar reasons…or is it just ‘good money for something he likes to do’? What?

    I’m not sure which character is more lonely: the buyer or the seller?

  15. MsHellion
     · November 12th, 2007 at 3:26 pm · Link

    Nah, Terrio, I’m with you in the minority. *LOL* For the same reason. *LOL* Maggie’s been spoiled to her sweet and handsome hubby.

  16. Maggie Robinson
     · November 12th, 2007 at 3:48 pm · Link

    Yeah, Beverley, the guy is not bad. And lucky for him, he’s still wearing his jeans so the sand cannot get in his nooks and crannies.

    Hellion, when you think about it, the human condition is a lonely one (handsome hubby or not). I think most people are looking to make some sort of connection. Prostitution to me is a victimless crime, but it just smacks of desperation. And I’d be interested in the fantasy life a stud might have to have to perform to everybody’s satisfaction, LOL. I think it’s a lot easier for a woman to fake it.

  17. terrio
     · November 12th, 2007 at 5:23 pm · Link

    I did think of that whole “would they all look like the dude in the pic” thing. HBO ran a reality show about one of the regular brothels out there and let’s just say, most of the employees were not playmate of the year material. I think women are more discerning and we would definitely the whole *package*. Pun intended. *G*

  18. MsHellion
     · November 12th, 2007 at 5:25 pm · Link

    We want the whole package–or they better prove they can work the package they’ve got to our satisfaction or we want our money back….

  19. Maggie Robinson
     · November 12th, 2007 at 5:30 pm · Link

    Terrio, you know you have the dubious distinction of being chosen as our representative to the Stud Farm when it opens. We expect you to write a best-selling book about it, and possibly save some young man from a life of sin. *g* Hellion, you can be back-up. And I agree, the whole package is very important. I imagine Heidi’s wares will be online for our inspection in the future. I’ll be keeping at least one eye open for it.

  20. Maggie Robinson
     · November 12th, 2007 at 5:31 pm · Link

    Oh, and the “dude in the picture” was something I found, not an actual employee of the as-yet-to-open establishment. But the dude…well, he almost looks worth the $.

  21. Santa
     · November 16th, 2007 at 10:27 am · Link

    I really have to visit this blog more often! I want a man – a good man- do clean my grout for me. I’d pay real good money for someone to do that for me.

    Yardwork too but I got my man to do that. Then we play gardener and lonely housewife….oops, that would be Tessa’s blog wouldn’t it!